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joeluke

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joeluke

Priests Guilt

"Father Patrick!" I shouted to the elderly priest, "Father Patrick! It's good to see you again." "Hello Brian," he responded by taking my outstretched hand. "It's been a long time. I'm surprised you...
16:19 Sun 16th Dec 20124 answers, last by sibton 18:27 Sun 16th Dec 2012
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joeluke

Christmas Transvestites

Men who like to eat, drink, and be Mary....
15:48 Sun 16th Dec 2012
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joeluke

Date

Went on a date with a girl I'd recently met last night The drinks were going down fairly quick and the conversation soon turned to sex. "When was the last time you had sex?" she asked "I don't want to...
19:44 Sat 15th Dec 20121 answer, last by douglas9401 19:49 Sat 15th Dec 2012
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joeluke

Proposition

"Hey, big boy" Dave's wife whispered hornily in his ear "I want you to take me somewhere you've never taken me before" Dave soon found out that 'to a WeightWatchers meeting' isn't...
19:09 Thu 06th Dec 20122 answers, last by Starbuckone 23:13 Thu 06th Dec 2012
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joeluke

Nightclub

I was in a nightclub when some fat bird came up to me and tripped over. "Oh, while you're down there," I said as she made her way up. "You cheeky git," she laughed with a wink....
22:48 Tue 04th Dec 20125 answers, last by Starbuckone 15:24 Wed 05th Dec 2012
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joeluke

Frosty

I was in the pub late last night, when I said to my mate "I can see it being very frosty in the morning." "How do you know that?" he asked. "Simple really" I said....
21:34 Tue 04th Dec 20127 answers, last by owdhamer 00:12 Wed 05th Dec 2012
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joeluke

Man City

Roberto Mancini has said that to beat Chelsea today, Manchester City are going to have to play ugly. He is expected to start up front next to Aguero....
14:55 Sun 25th Nov 20121 answer, last by Mrsspagnoli57 20:20 Sun 25th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Wardrobe

Dave gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from his bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed,sweating and panting. "What's up?" he says. "I'm...
20:50 Fri 23rd Nov 20125 answers, last by Starbuckone 11:39 Sat 24th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Thanksgiving

Today is the day when all our American friends pig out and eat and eat and eat until they are fit to burst. Thursday....
21:35 Thu 22nd Nov 20125 answers, last by robert551069 01:41 Fri 23rd Nov 2012
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joeluke

Tooth

Dave's wife lost a tooth while eating a packet of dry roasted peanuts. To be fair he did actually warn her not to keep rustling the bag while the football was on...
21:33 Thu 22nd Nov 20124 answers, last by sibton 21:57 Thu 22nd Nov 2012
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joeluke

Underrated players

Watched a Man of the Match performance by Shane Long on MOTD this morning Great striker, scores goals, sets up goals, works hard for the team With respect to West Brom he could do a good job at a...
15:26 Sun 18th Nov 20123 answers, last by joeluke 16:28 Wed 21st Nov 2012
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joeluke

I'm a celebrity

I can't believe that Helen Flanagan failed in her latest trial. I thought that going down and taking a star in her mouth would have been second nature to her...
21:01 Sat 17th Nov 20123 answers, last by Jemisa 14:17 Sun 18th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Fearne Cotton

Did she look in the mirror when she got dressed tonight?
23:14 Fri 16th Nov 201220 answers, last by chaptazbru 15:41 Sat 17th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Cure

Doctors have come up with a cure for ADHD. A good clip round the ear....
20:11 Tue 13th Nov 20128 answers, last by Slapshot 22:33 Tue 13th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Skirt

My wife was wearing one of those skirts where I could just see the bottom of her bum cheeks. I'd probably have found it sexy if the skirt wasn't actually knee length....
20:08 Tue 13th Nov 20121 answer, last by tonyav 20:10 Tue 13th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Shopping

What do you call somebody walking out of a supermarket carrying a Waitrose bag in one hand and a Sainsburys one in the other? A Lidl shopper......
21:39 Sat 03rd Nov 20123 answers, last by dorromay71 11:43 Sun 04th Nov 2012
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joeluke

Car wash

I was out in the garden when I looked across the road and noticed my sexy neighbour washing her car. She glanced across at me, put the water hose in her mouth and gave me a cheeky wink I walked over...
20:17 Fri 02nd Nov 20122 answers, last by JonnyBoy12 18:55 Sun 04th Nov 2012

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