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marval

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chrisrob

Fishy Latin

Caviar Emptor - Beware of the fish. Carp Diem - Seize the fish. Veni, Vidi, Fishy - I came, I saw, I fished. Cod Erat Demonstrandum - Proving the fish. Squid pro quo - Done a fishy deal. Tempus...
11:52 Tue 21st Apr 20091 answer, last by marval 14:47 Tue 21st Apr 2009
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BilluSugger

An expectant father rings the hospital

to see how his wife is getting on. By mistake he's connected to Lords cricket ground. "How's it going?" he asks. "Fine.", comes the answer, "We've got three out and hope to have the rest out before...
14:19 Tue 21st Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 14:46 Tue 21st Apr 2009
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Caribeing

Jenni Falconer nice face shame about the voice

Jenni Falconer on the National Lottery has the most grating voice have to turn the sound down when she is on! Melanie Brown(Spice Girls) is all right until she opens her mouth! Who else grates on your...
23:33 Sat 18th Apr 200933 answers, last by Mary T 21:14 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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marval

Butlers night off

A wealthy couple prepared to go out for the evening. The woman of the house gave their butler, Jervis, the night off. She said they would return home very late, and she hoped he would enjoy his...
23:56 Sun 19th Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 20:48 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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SLINKYKATE

what was your first operation

mine was getting my tonsils out when i was in Australia,i was 20.
16:56 Mon 20th Apr 200934 answers, last by sallabananas 09:43 Tue 21st Apr 2009
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marval

Chinese translations

Are you harbouring a fugitive?........Hu Yu Hai Ding? See me A.S.A.P???Kum Hia Nao Stupid Man??..Dum Gai Small Horse??..Tai Ni Po Ni Your price is too high!!........No Bai Dam Thing!! Did you go to...
13:28 Mon 20th Apr 20094 answers, last by MalcolmY 21:56 Sun 17th May 2009
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robknot

Is this a crime or waste of time?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/wiltshire/8 001796.stm should charges have been brought against this couple or was this really a case of "tough luck" for the person who originally bought the...
13:44 Thu 16th Apr 200923 answers, last by marval 15:27 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

An extra joke for today

Dylan is in a queue at the Supermarket when he notices that the rather dishy blonde behind him has just raised her hand and is giving him a big 'hello' . He is rather taken aback that such a looker...
10:39 Mon 20th Apr 20091 answer, last by marval 13:01 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

More translations

Harlez-vous francais?? .....? Can you drive a French motorcycle? Repondez s'il vous plaid .....? Honk if you're Scots. Que sera serf .....? Life is feudal. Monage a trois .....? I am three years old....
10:36 Mon 20th Apr 20092 answers, last by squarebear 12:59 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

Rumble in the jungle

Three animals were having a huge argument over who was the best. The first, a hawk, claimed that because of his ability to fly, he could attack anything repeatedly from above, and his prey didn't have...
10:29 Mon 20th Apr 20093 answers, last by poodicat 14:31 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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ailie

Jokes to baffle non-Scots.

A woman walks into a baker's and asks: "Is that a doughnut or a meringue?" The baker replies:"No, you're right, hen, it's a doughnut." What's the difference between Bing Crosby and Walt Disney? Bing...
10:21 Mon 20th Apr 20095 answers, last by ailie 13:18 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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BilluSugger

Gone

What was the name of the character in Gone with the wind who laughs a lot? Scarlett O'Haha
20:48 Sun 19th Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 22:48 Sun 19th Apr 2009
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stewey

Did you realize

....that there are certain things that we hope to God will function when we need them, but have no really practical way of testing them prior to that need. For example: parachutes, air-bags in cars,...
17:28 Sun 19th Apr 200923 answers, last by stewey 18:13 Sun 19th Apr 2009
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Steve.5

name in the song title

How many UK No 1s can you REMEMBER were the title contained a name.
14:38 Sun 19th Apr 20099 answers, last by Supermike 15:28 Mon 20th Apr 2009
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Cabbage.

There is something strange

going on. Have you noticed?
17:05 Sun 19th Apr 200937 answers, last by Cabbage. 02:29 Mon 27th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

More Daffynitions (from an old Washington Post)

1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon. 2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained. 3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. 4. Esplanade...
10:54 Sun 19th Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 12:50 Sun 19th Apr 2009
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chrisrob

Cheese

For some people the only puns they make are about dairy products, because the rest are just too cheesy. When they think of one, they tend to milk it for all it's worth. Usually I don't think they're...
10:42 Sun 19th Apr 20098 answers, last by No,Knowledge 14:17 Sun 19th Apr 2009
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marval

Fortune Telling Nanny

The story of Mary Poppins as a nanny is well known. Less well known is her subsequent tale.... She travelled to Hollywood, where she opened a shop on Sunset Boulevard as a fortune-teller. Of course,...
23:42 Fri 17th Apr 20092 answers, last by marval 12:46 Sun 19th Apr 2009
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ailie

Humour for Lexophiles

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. ----------------------------------------------------- Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest....
16:38 Sat 18th Apr 20092 answers, last by craft1948 17:29 Sat 18th Apr 2009
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BilluSugger

Handyman

A man applies for the job of handyman at a big house . The owner says " can fix doors?" "No" he answers She asks "are you any good around the garden?" "No" "What about changing a plug?" "No"...
18:30 Fri 17th Apr 20093 answers, last by francescasummers 12:04 Tue 14th Jan 2014

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